Burj Dubai Versus The Empire State Building And Dubai, You Are Stupid

September 28, 2009

Skyscraper followers will be happy to know that the Burj Dubai, although not completely finished, has topped out at the official height of 2,684 feet (that’s, like, half a mile) and is now officially the tallest building on the planet!

Burj Dubai Relative Height

If you’re having trouble wrapping your mind around those numbers, you’re not the only one.  Here’s some help:

burj dubai in midtown new york


The folks over at This Is The Green Room did some computations to compare the views of midtown New York from the Empire State Building to the same view were it from the Burj Dubai.  The difference is staggering:

empire state building southern view
empire state building souther view - burj dubai height

Additional, similar comparisons here.

While all of this is plenty fascinating, one has to remember that the geography of Dubai in no way required such an outlandishly expensive  (impractical?) structure and since Dubai’s building craze was conducted with the same zeal as a 6-year-old pursuing ice cream, the country is basically in a big fat bankruptcy clusterfuck right now.

Oh, and note to Dubai: before you try to make the world’s new vacation destination, you may want to take a step back and realize that Islamic law prohibits just about EVERYTHING THE REST OF THE WORLD ENJOYS DOING ON VACATION. Just sayin’.

And lastly in my “Dubai, You Are Stupid” rant, is this little video from Gizmodo. What do you get when you build the world’s tallest building in a fucking desert?!  Really, really dusty windows.  And dusty windows need cleaning.

More on the Burj Dubai at Wikipedia


August 21, 2009

weather august

Temperature 85°!?  Ew.
Dew point 77°!? Ew.
Relative humidity 76%!? Ew.
Heat index: 96°!? Ew.

As Soon As I Have $25 Million To Spare…

August 17, 2009

…I’m moving into the triplex clocktower penthouse here:

dumbo clocktower 1dumbo clocktower 2dumbo clocktower 3dumbo clocktower 5dumbo clocktower 4

Look. At. That. View.

If the unit sells for the listing price, it would be the borough’s most expensive property sale by a $14 million margin.

More photos at The Times.

My Current Desktop

July 24, 2009


Grand Central Terminal, taken after a stupid job interview in stupid Midtown.  At least I got a good pic out of it. Click pic to enlarge.

Breaking News: Butt-Slapper Terrorizing Subway Passengers!

July 9, 2009
serial butt slapper

Serial Butt Slapper

WPIX-11 (“Yes, we have news”) is reporting that since June 19, a SERIAL BUTT SLAPPER – pause and repeat – A SERIAL BUTT SLAPPER has been terrorizing women while riding the subway near stations in Crown Heights.

According to reports, the women said, “Harder!” but the man refused to slap “harder.”

No, I kid.

Apparently this subtlety-challenged individual has been leaving hand prints on all sorts of ladies’ asses aged 19-44, to which I say: Ageist! Sexist! Homophobe! Spread the love, asshole!

Honestly, though, I think these women need to calm down a little.  Groping is the new flirtatious eye contact. Get with the ’00’s. If I didn’t routinely fondle strangers on the D-train at 4:00 AM on a Saturday, I wouldn’t have had half the meaningful 6-hour fuck parties relationships I’ve had.

These woman have been whining like they were kicked in the uterus or something so the police have said they’re working weally, weally hard on the case (yeah, right) but admit they haven’t made any arrests and THE BUTT SLAPPER IS STILL AT LARGE.


Missed Connection: Christian Slater. Kind Of.

July 7, 2009


Oh, Williamsburg.


My Current Desktop

June 25, 2009


The Williamsbugh (sic) Savings Bank tower at sunset. Click pic to enlarge. Located at 1 Hanson Place on the edge of the Fort Greene (not Williamsburg) neighborhood of Brooklyn, it is the tallest building in the borough at 37 stories/512 feet. The top floors have been recently been converted to condos, including 2,300 square-foot full-floor penthouses directly below the clock; here’s a marketing shot from the building’s website:

one hanson place

As you can see, even a view from the building’s lowest converted floor – the 18th – would still yield pretty great city views.

Trivia: The lack of any tall neighbors means the hands on the building’s four clock faces were subjected to brutal and unchecked wind, which usually meant all four faces of the clock would display a different time. As part of the renovation/conversion contract, the giant hands were to be redesigned to withstand the winds they faced. Perhaps eager to show off their new achievement, the designers lined the hands with awful red lights that are far brighter than any of the building’s other exterior lighting. Oh, and sometimes they still display the wrong time.