Horrified Marian Milczarek, 53, from Lesna in south west Poland, was attacked following a row with his friend – apparently over borrowing a trailer.
‘He began hitting me with a chain and then pulled down my trousers and started biting. It was agony,’ he said.
Oh, but they could reattach it, right??? Well…
Police and medics could find no trace of Marian’s missing genitalia, and believe his attacker Wojciech Sowinski – now facing 10 years in jail – may have eaten it.
‘If we’d had the other bit of his penis we could have sewn it back on,’ said Dr Adam Domanasiewicz from the hospital in nearby Trzebnica, where Marian is recovering.
And that’s why I don’t lend friends my trailer.